It's been a whirlwind couple of weeks around here! Helping our grand daughters get settled into new school and preschool classes, supporting our daughter and celebrating with her as she makes a new path in life (and soon a new son in law to welcome). Working my business and preparing for a long awaited vacation trip. It kind of all came together in a big *clash* yesterday as I looked at mountains of vacation laundry, one load of which got left in the washer so I'm sure will have to be washed again, baking a birthday cake, planning a home cooked birthday dinner for my husband all while working the online portion of my job in the midst of one of the biggest days we have had in months. One of my team members commented "How did you manage to make a cake while getting caught up?"
I finished yesterday being pretty hard on myself. I had set goals and worked hard to achieve them. After a great vacation that I paid for with my direct sales income I set about to nurture my customers and take care of them. I also touched base with my wonderful team of women and made efforts to encourage them, build them up and learn what their desires are. Even though my intentions were good, all through the day all I could do was compare myself to others. Some of the goals I had set for myself I have already surpassed, but some are still limping along and may need adjusting. Do you look at others and say "I could never do what she does?" Yes, you can. Do you dream big and then see others achieve what you want and say "I might as well give up, I will never get there". You only fail when you quit. I'm not just talking about my direct sales business here, though it is what got me thinking deeply about this. Some would look at my progress in this 2.5 years and see great success, and for the norm that would be true. The interesting thing is I actually think I'm 'hungrier' for it because I'm so much older than most of the women I work with. I don't dream of big houses and lots of 'things', I dream of less. I dream of slowing down - sitting longer on a porch in the mountains, and leaving the chaos behind. Sadly, I have to work hard to get there. After years of trying to 'keep up with the Jones' the need is now to pay off, downsize, and simplify and the only way to do that is to succeed at what I do.
When I looked at where I was yesterday, running like a wild person to plan a nice evening with family, get things in order after being gone for a week and still run my business on one of the biggest days of the year I fell short - in my own mind. Some would look at my progress and say "wow!" the thing I saw was the goals I didn't meet. I fell in to that horrible trap of comparison. Friends ~ there will always be someone who accomplishes more and those who accomplish less then we do. Comparing can be like poison! Instead of celebrating the great things I DID do yesterday, the last thing I thought about when I went to sleep was "I can't believe I didn't get the new team members in Mexico that I nurtured".
I made a choice when I woke up today - to be thankful. So here it is:
*A wonderful family that had a fun time around a dinner table - laughing, eating and celebrating a birthday together
*A mountain of laundry that was a sign of a relaxing week where my husband and I did basically NOTHING but relax
*Good friends
*A home, food, clothing and way more than we ever need when so many do not have necessities
*A sales level in my business this month that for most would be a dream
*Excellent health
*A faith in God that is so strong it gets me through the worst of times
Last night I would have made a longer list of everything that wasn't going how I planned. I'm not even going to write those down or give voice to them! Yesterday when I went to pick my oldest grand daughter up from her swim team practice the coach was giving the swimmers their end of lesson pep talk. I only caught a small portion of it, but one thing stuck with me as he spoke to them about character. He said "it's all well and good to be kind, excellent at what you do and 'good' when people are looking, but who are you when no one is looking?" Good for him for not only teaching those youngsters to swim well but to instill the values of good moral character as well. Way to go Coach for planting those seeds! It also got me thinking of the seeds I plant in my own heart. I ended yesterday a little resentful, I had done hard work to accomplish some things that just didn't happen. I failed to celebrate the good things that did. I started to doubt my self because I didn't achieve some of my goals - yet.
So which voice do you listen to? Today I'm going to listen to the whisper that says "you can do it, keep going after your dreams and do it in a kind, honorable and faithful way". I won't listen to the shout that is screaming at me "You didn't do it! Did you see what she did!? Why didn't you stay up one more hour, or send one more message, or make one more call? You will never get there!" I choose the whisper and the gentle answer that is saying "Well done my good and faithful servant, you chose the better path of joy".
I'm great at sending encouragement and support to those around me, I just need to whisper to myself more often. I applaud accomplishment - no matter how small. I just need to do the same for myself. Be kind to to yourself today and take a moment to whisper to yourself "I'm proud of you!"
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