Calling

What comes to your mind when you hear the word 'calling'?  I'm not talking about calling someone on the phone, but a calling on your life.  For most I have asked it is tied to ministry of some sort, or a religious call.  Perhaps today I will get you thinking a bit deeper about calling.

I am constantly looking at my life, as I near 60 years of age, and what I have accomplished. I tend to be somewhat pessimistic, so often my thoughts and reflections go to all of the things that I haven't accomplished.  I have had an emptiness for some time now and keep asking God "what is it, what am I missing?"  I have been down many paths and several times was certain that God was calling me to those jobs, activities or places.  As I contemplate that I'm more convinced than ever that He was, there was a purpose for everything I have done and experienced.  I also am realizing that there are seasons for everything and we travel through those seasons.  Things end, they change and they morph into something else entirely.  The calling that I had when we moved to this town over 10 years ago, for me to take a job, and uproot our entire way of life was so certain and obvious. When that job ended I experienced deep grief.  I was certain that I would work at that job until I retired, have a sappy party and that would be it.  Do I still think I was called to that job? Yes.  Did it play out like I imagined?  Not even close!

I love learning, and I will never stop reading, studying and trying new things.  As long as I'm breathing I plan to be learning new things every day.  When I look back at some of the things I've done I have my husband (or others) question me sometimes.  "Why did you take that Life Coaching certification, that was a lot of money that you aren't doing anything with?" "Why did you bother getting that  Christian Administration degree at age 47, you sell a beauty product!?"  Believe me, I ask myself the same questions much more often than others ask!    I also have things in my past that I was certain were callings and I ignored or turned from them. I can't go back and change those, but I can learn from those decisions.

This last week I  attended an intensive training program and certification for yet another path that I am about to journey down.  I wasn't seeking this out, it came to me in a rather unusual manner, but as I have said 'yes' to traveling this new path it is becoming very evident that all I have done to this point have been leading me to this place.  Will I still sell Jamberry nail and hand care products?  Yes, at least for now.  I love the income that enables us to pay bills, but my favorite part of the business is mentoring those on my team - it 'calls' me. Sitting in one of the classes last week where we were discussing this very topic  the trainer made a statement that has been rattling around in my head ever since I heard it "if the thing you are considering is something that you absolutely know you must do, at all cost, it may be a calling".  There have been jobs I have loved, but would I have considered staying with it at all cost?    One definition of calling is this: Divine summons, invitation or vocation.  

It may be so powerful that you can't ignore it.  It may be a gentle whisper that you need to get quiet enough to hear it clearly.  The question is the same - do you answer or not?  

Another question the trainer posed that has really had me thinking - do you retire from a calling?  Think about that one for a minute.  For me, the call is becoming something I must do, no matter the cost, and there is no retiring from that.  These questions just cause me to have more questions - does a calling change?  What if you think more than one thing is calling you?  What do you consider in answering? Who will your answer impact besides yourself?  Will your answer alter things in a negative way for others in your life?  It is really a calling or a desire?  

Look at that definition of calling again - a divine summons, invitation or vocation. 

Now look at desire: An emotion or excitement of the mind, directed at the attainment or possession or an object from which pleasure, sensual, intellectual or spiritual, is expected; a passion excited by the love of an object, or uneasiness at the want of it, and directed to its attainment or possession.

When you have a calling you have an urging within you that you must do it, no matter what-without hurting others in the process.  No matter what others do in response, no matter if you see an expected result, you must do it because it is a divine call.  Desire?  It can be just as powerful, but that desire is directed at achieving a goal and possessing it.  

Are you being called or do you simply desire to do the thing or have the job or complete the task YOU want?

Have I given you something to think about?  It sure is weighing on me!!