Word of the Year!

Every year I pick a phrase or word to focus on.  I rarely share that with anyone, I just write about it in my personal journals.  I have done this since i was a young girl with my first little diary. Many times, just like other New Year's resolutions, I loose focus early on and may revisit my word or phrase a few times over the next 12 months.  One year I picked a word each month to focus on and I would choose a word that started with the same first letter as each current month.  I remember one word vividly - it was in April of 2007 and my word was angst.  I was experiencing a lot of angst in my life at that time, but I also would let that spill over into my prayer time. I would pause and reflect on others around me that were suffering angst and pray for them - thus taking the focus off of my own problems.

In 2015 my mantra has been simplify and declutter.  If you glance back through some of my blog posts from last spring you can read about part of that journey.  It all started in a search for 'something' and needing to simplify in order to hopefully find it.  I have been on a spiritual journey, a cleansing of sorts - and unlike many other things I have actually been carrying on through the year. Some of the closets that I purged are still in good order (long way to go!). Over the last few days I had even considered just keeping the simplify as my focus for another year, to continue on.  I will be doing that, but my thoughts are shifting just a bit more.

My word for 2016 is ENOUGH.

I am who I am.  I have fought that for so long and part of my journey has been trying to be someone else.  Thinking that I had to fit into a mold that was expected of me.  I have made some good progress over the last 2 years in discovering me - but there is more to be done. By constantly reminding myself that I am enough perhaps the demons of envy, doubt, frustration and sadness can be kept somewhat at bay.  I had also been considering the word balance.  After careful consideration I settled on enough.  Balance is similar - finding balance in life between all things that pull at me.  As soon as enough came to mind it was clear - that is the word!  Not too much, not too little - enough.  

Enough time with family - enough time alone - enough to meet needs - enough to give. When you think about it, by being in balance, there is enough!  The biggest challenge, at least for me, is letting myself determine what is and isn't enough, not the world.  To not be swayed by others.  I will look to God and find my direction in Him - to be the person He created me to be and believe that I am enough. The spiritual part is actually pretty easy for me, it is the every day living part that gets hard.  

When choosing a word for the year I also look at synonyms - some of the ones for enough are : abundant, adequate, ample, full, sufficient, and suitable.  There are some negative ones as well:  fed up, last straw etc.  "I've had enough!"  I ponder all of these things when I choose a word of the year (WOTY).  It was because I had had too much of some things that I started on the simplicity journey.  Too many clothes, too many knick-knacks, too many cookbooks, too much debt......the list goes on!  I envisioned my daughter having to go through all of my things and saying "why in the world did she save THIS!?"  I realized that many things I have been placing value on really don't matter to anyone else. This doesn't mean that I will live in a stark and barren home with nothing around me, it simply means I'll examine my 'why' and settle on what is enough - for me.

All through Advent, and now Christmastide, I have been asking myself and others the question "Why Jesus"?  I'm still asking myself "why isn't God enough?"  Along with my WOTY I will ponder this passage 2 Corinthians 12.  Paul was a working man!  After his conversion, when he quit killing Christians and instead was Christ's most loyal witness and follower he wrote often about his experiences with God.  Paul was given a 'thorn in his flesh' and though much has been speculated through the centuries as to what that actually was, he wrote these words about his affliction:

2 Corinthians 12:6-10 If I wanted to boast, I would be no fool in doing so, because I would be telling the truth. But I won't do it, because I don't want anyone to give me credit beyond what they can see in my life or hear in my message, even though I have received such wonderful messages from God. So to keep me from boasting and becoming proud, I was given a thorn in my flesh, a messenger from Satan to torment me and keep me from becoming proud.  Three different times I begged the Lord to take it away. Each time he said, "My grace is all you need. My power works best in weakness."  So now I am glad to boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ can work through me.  That's why I take pleasure in my weakness, and in the insults, hardships, persecution and troubles that I suffer for Christ.  For when I am weak, then I am strong.

I want Jesus to 'be enough'.  Only I can make him so.  What is enough for me, may not be for you.  All I know is that I must work on ME.  My WOTY is not just a catchy little thing to talk about, as I rarely do - it is something that I ponder and quietly write about yet hopefully prompt changes in myself that God would approve of.   Rather than resolutions that I rarely keep, or grand plans to make big changes that fail and then cause me to plunge into depression again - focusing on enough seems like a good path to take!

Decluttering is what got me started - finding my purpose is what is keeping me going.  What will your 'word of the year' be?  

Is that all there is?!

Wow, what a few days!  Mostly centered around weather - here in central Texas things have changed drastically.  From nearly 80 degrees on Christmas Eve, with our house open and sun shining, this morning there is a wind chill of 25 and a large portion of this state and others has been devastated by killer tornadoes, a record setting blizzard and treacherous weather. How quickly things change!

I see many people 'change' just as dramatically.  It is as if the clock strikes midnight on December 26 and "ok, i'm done - Christmas is over".  The boxes are packed up, the lights are taken down and in some cases our patience, tolerance, generosity and "peace and goodwill" go back in the attic as well. For some it may be easier to wait and hope for a miracle when surrounded by the beauty of the Christmas season, but when the sparkles and glitter are boxed away our despair or doubt creeps back in. 

Christmastide (Christmas Day through January 6 - Epiphany) is our real season of giving. We often hear the story presented as the 3 wise men, or 3 kings that came to visit baby Jesus in the stable.  (They were astronomers and traveled a long distance, arriving to see Jesus when he was at his home, and when you study the story you will learn that they first visited Herod, thinking that this new "king" must be at the royal home.  What followed could be an entire book!) Herod is so threatened he orders the killing of boys under age 2. Violence and fear are certainly not what we expect from this Christmas story.  There are also accounts that had to have been troubling for Mary and  Joseph.  Here they were with their new baby and believing that he was the child of God, sent to save their people.  When they take young Jesus to be presented at the temple this is the record of an encounter they have with a man named Simeon:

Luke 2:25-35 At that time there was a man from Jerusalem named Simeon. He was righteous and devout and was eagerly waiting for the Messiah to come and rescue Israel. The Holy Spirit was upon him and revealed to him  that he would not die until he had seen the Lord's Messiah. That day the Spirit led him to the Temple. So when Mary and Joseph came to present baby Jesus to the Lord as the law required. Simeon was there.  He took the child in his arms and praised God, saying "Sovereign Lord, now let your servant die in peace, as you have promised.  I have seen your salvation, which you have prepared for all people. He is a light to reveal God to the nations and he is the glory of your people Israel!"  Jesus' parents were amazed at what was being said about him.  Then Simeon blessed them, and he said to Mary, the baby's mother, "This child is destined to cause many in Israel to fall, but he will bring joy to many others. He has been sent as a sign from God, but many will oppose him. As a result, the deepest thoughts of many hearts will be revealed. And a sword will pierce your very soul".

Not exactly comforting words!  Also not the feel good story we hear all through Advent. So now the work of Christmas begins. As we wade through the days to come, starting to focus on a new year and what it will hold for each of us, this is when we each should really ask "why Jesus"?  It is easier to pack that manger scene away, along with all of the other decorations, and settle back to whatever was troubling you before and just pick it back up. We also have new worries and setbacks - people dying just one day after Christmas in horrible night time tornadoes, flooding and more.  There have also been people dying each day from violence, starvation and homelessness all over the world each day that we have been celebrating Christmas.  Our focus has simply been on the sparkles and 'fun' that have filled our homes.  Just as Simeon stated, Jesus came "to bring joy".   He was sent as a sign from God, and our job is to recognize that 'sign' and show it to others.  "Here's your sign!" 

I have some in my family that already have taken down all their signs of Christmas.  The decorations are nicely packed away and homes are neatly back in order.  I will do the same over the next few days, first my Santa things will be put away, and I will arrange some snow and winter decor in those areas. Though we have 25 wind chill today, and it really feels like winter, I also know that this is Texas - and we could be back in flips flops in a few days!  So I like my home to at least look like winter for a little while.  I also have some things I leave out all year - like this quote from Charles Dickens that hangs in my kitchen:

I will honor Christmas in my heart and try to keep it all the year. C. Dickens

I look at this pretty stitchery, hanging above my pantry, quite often.  When we 'honor' something we are giving it importance.  So by reminding myself throughout the year of those things I have been writing about, I'm more likely to make them part of my daily life: loving, giving, serving.  It's not always easy!  As we see people that have lost everything in these horrific tornadoes, it would be easy to say "Why, God?!"  The promise of Christmas is not that life will be easy.   As Simeon also stated, many will oppose him, and the deepest thoughts of our hearts will be revealed.  What are the deepest thoughts that will be revealed in you?  As you put away your "Christmas cheer" will judgment, sarcasm and criticism be revealed? Or will compassion and acceptance be the sign you carry?  As we journey through these next few days of Christmastide to complete our journey, keep asking "Why Jesus" and listen for what you can learn from him- then carry your sign proudly!

Why Jesus?

I wrote these words back in November at the beginning of this advent season:

So why Jesus?  Why revisit this ancient story and all of the promise of a better life? For me, because that is exactly what I need!  A sense of hope that there is something way bigger than cancer, divorce and horrid terror killings.  A realization that the God I put my trust in, and decided to follow back in 1971 at a revival on my knees, is the same God that gives hope to a world in despair. 

I pray my writings this year will spark a little bit of wonder in your life too.  That you will look deeper than the sparkle and hype of the Christmas season and look at the real reason, and maybe we all can have an answer come December 24 of "why Jesus" is the real solution we are seeking.

I don't know if any of you have a better answer to "why Jesus", but I know it has helped me to focus on something, and someone, outside of myself these last few weeks.  My prayer as I wrote each day, and today, is that you have found some peace for your soul.  That when you ask "why Jesus" or "why, Jesus!?" God will provide just what you need.

Today I will finish preparations for a time with my small family.  I will miss my large extended family.  I will cook, I will clean and I will attend worship.  I will sit quietly in this chair and have a moment with God and pray for those that will seek Him today.  May YOUR day be blessed by God no matter what it looks like for you.  Gather with others and praise his name on this CHRISTmas. Keep asking "why Jesus" and He will show you.

From my home to yours.......blessings on this day and always.  If you have awakened a new curiosity, and have a longing to learn more about God and Jesus, I would love to hear from you.    Merry Christmas~  Connie

NOT seeing is believing!

Which one of your human traits makes it hardest for you to accept and believe in the miracles and goodness of God? What gets in the way?

Yesterday, much to my dismay, was a very warm and sunny day in central Texas. As I went outside to hang some clothes on the line I could see some of my Christmas decorations had been moved.  They were in completely different locations, and I then noticed that the trees were bending in the wind (at least I knew my clothes would dry faster!). We can't see the wind, but we can certainly see and feel the impact that wind has.  I looked through many pictures of wind-bent trees and this one stuck with me:

A wide open space, nothing around those Hawthorn trees, but the wind has shaped them. They sink their roots deep into the ground for nourishment and they take what is 'blown' at them and continue to live. I can't see the wind, but I believe in the power and impact it has because I can see the result.  

Sometimes those forces that are unseen are so powerful, yet so destructive.  Winds so strong that the tree could no longer stand.  Perhaps it was because the roots had been compromised from the house and other structures so close by.  Or perhaps a combination of the wind, pounding rain, and other things in the area cause the tree to just give way. 

Life is like that, for us too.  As we wait for this joyous day and remembrance of God sending His Son to us, we either sink our roots deep into the rich soil of that love and hold on and bend - no matter what comes, or we sometimes have that unseen 'wind' of grief, illness, debt, sadness, hate, disappointment and unrealized expectations all crowd in on us at once and in the perfect storm the tree crashes down, with nothing to hold it up anymore.  

2 Corinthians 2:7-16  (Paul's message) No, the wisdom we speak of is the mystery of God - his plan that was previously hidden, even though he made it for our ultimate glory before the world began. But the rulers of this world have not understood it; if they had, they would not have crucified our glorious Lord. That is what the Scriptures mean when they say "No eye has seen, no ear has heard, and no mind has imagined what God has prepared for those who love him."  But it was to us that God revealed these things by his Spirit. For his Spirit searches out everything and shows us God's deep secrets. No one can know God's thoughts except God's own Spirit. And we have received God's Spirit (not the world's spirit) so we can know the wonderful things God has freely given us.  When we tell you these things, we do not use words that come from human wisdom. Instead we speak words given to us by the Spirit, using the Spirit's words to explain spiritual truths.  But people who aren't spiritual can't receive these truths from God's Spirit. It all sounds foolish to them and they can't understand it, for only those who are spiritual can understand what the Spirit means. Those who are not spiritual can evaluate all things, but they themselves cannot be evaluated by others. "Who can know the Lord's thoughts? Who knows enough to teach him?" But we understand these things, for we have the mind of Christ.

As you go about this day, many of you  are probably hustling and bustling with last minute preparations of the season.  Or maybe you are one that is getting lonelier by the day as others are so busy with their plans - ponder for awhile what you have learned about God that is deep in your heart and you know is true but cannot explain rationally. Are you comfortable with truths you cannot explain?  What bends you? How do you hold up when the unseen and forceful winds come?  If you are one that is toppling over and just can't stand anymore - look at that tree above again (the one bending in the wind) There is a second tree right next to it that is also bent but still holding on. Look around you - where do you see another "bent tree"? Perhaps you can reach out to each other.  Or perhaps that other tree you see is the one who is getting ready for church each week while you sit home, you know the struggles in their life yet they seem to be handling them much differently then you.  Or even bigger, perhaps your friend appears to be standing tall and strong and faithful, yet there are internal struggles that you know nothing about.  Let God reveal His unseen truths to you. Rest in the Mystery that is God and this miraculous birth of Jesus that we celebrate. Without asking for understanding, welcome God.  It's ok to not understand what you don't see - simply sit with God and welcome Him in silence.

Waiting............

Things we wait for:  Lights to change, doctors to see us, cookies to bake, bread to rise, loved ones to call us, war to end, gardens to grow, vacations to begin, paychecks to arrive, children to come home, rain, diseases to be cured, grief to lessen, babies to be born..........

Jesus to return.

What do you value? In what do you place your hope? 

We wait..........

Bah......humbug

HUMBUG DAY

When the stresses of the holiday season have piled up, many of us start to feel a bit like Scrooge.  This day was created to allow us an opportunity to express our frustrations.  Humbug Day is celebrated annually on December 21.

I often use "national day of ..." calendars and postings in my Jamberry business.  It is fun to find images of certain events and pair nail art wraps with those.  People love to go all out in costumes for events and holidays.  Take the current Star Wars obsession!  Clothes, toys, parties and even other shows are talking about Star Wars.  I  had some friends of mine (more than one actually) dress their entire family up in costumes in order to attend a viewing of the new movie. I would say that it is a safe bet that many living rooms will be filled with Star Wars items when packages are unwrapped in just a few days.

Here is another one - sports teams or schools.  Oh my stars and garters...... people are over the top when it comes to their sports teams and I'm probably going to step on some toes with this one, the world is NOT going to come to an end if you don't wear a certain color or if 'your team' isn't worshiped by everyone else around you.   Worship is a powerful word, and for most of us the first thing that comes to mind is church.  When I got out my favorite dictionary (Webster's 1828 American Dictionary) I found 7 definitions of worship as a noun and several more as a verb.  I am going to list some of these and I would like you to reflect on where you place God, a favorite movie, your college or pro team, another person, a family tradition or a treasured possession in the definition:

Worship: to adore; to pay divine honors to; to honor with extravagant love and extreme submission.  To perform acts of adoration.   (I don't think worship is too strong of a word when I see some people that will miss all other things in order to watch their team play or to completely arrange schedules to revolve around a movie premier).

Yesterday as my husband and I were watching some football (since there was nothing else much on!), the announcers were talking about the upcoming schedule as the pro season winds down.  There will be a game on Thursday night, as Thursday Night Football has become routine over the last few years. Thursday night will be a little different at our house, and it has nothing to do with football! Christmas Eve is Thursday night.  I think it is safe to say that there will be hundreds of thousands of people sitting in a stadium watching that game - some even baring their chest, painted in the team colors and waving bizarre signs and acting crazy with hopes of being seen on the Jumbotron.  Still countless others will be watching on televisions - instead of sitting in a church pew and then around a meal table to discuss the reason we even call that day Christmas Eve. There will also be some that will 'worship' at the altar of certain family traditions, at all costs, when all reference to Jesus has been lost somewhere along the way.

It is evident that I love this season and all that goes along with it.  My home is decorated and I practice traditions that have been passed along for many years.  My "scrooge' comes out in other ways.  I wrote earlier in the season on this blog about expectations vs reality.  Time changes things and as I get older I realize that I don't like that very much.  I long for 'the way things were'.  I'm not going to dwell too much in the scrooge mode though.  Writing this entry today is one way to let it go.  To release the frustration that not everyone sees things the way I do. To ask "why, Jesus?"  Not "why Jesus" but WHY, Jesus do I feel this way?"  Why is it easier to worship things, money, athletes, events, traditions, and it is so hard to simply stop and worship you?  YOU , the one that can and does make the biggest impact on my life?  WHY do I push you so far down the list?  

For many people, me included, this next few days will be filled with activities.  My 6 year old granddaughter is out of school so she will be spending days with me.  I do  have things planned, things like baking and wrapping and anticipating.  As I write this my  'anti scrooge' plan is to slow down a bit. Take some time as we do all of these things to just talk, to visit with her about Jesus. To perhaps build up the spiritual traditions that I hold so dear, and lessen the material ones.  She has difficult things going on in her life, the first year of journeying through back and forth visitations with families as her parents figure out 'divorce'.  The family isn't going to look the same for her ever again, but Jesus will. How can I make Jesus more real for her, to sustain her through the many frustrating things that are to come in life? How can I share, on her 6 year old level, that believing in something you can't see is a comforting thing when the things you do see are so upsetting? How can I 'be Jesus'  to the neighbor, a young woman that battled through breast cancer alone, and all she wants is a mate? How can I comfort my friend that will face her first Christmas without her daughter that she lost to drugs?  It would be much easier to just immerse myself in the pretty part of the season, but these painful and dark things are really more the norm -all of them will still be here when all of the wrappings are discarded on Christmas morning.  Now ask yourself, "why Jesus"?  Because in all of it - he will be here, he IS here, and that is why we call it CHRISTmas.

Have a little moment - get your 'scrooge out' on Humbug Day, then draw closer to the One who waits to hold you up and help you through.

Wearing thin

I tend to hold on to things, sometimes long past when they should be released! I started on a mission last spring to declutter and simplify our home, and I made excellent progress but that back room still haunts me.  I keep the door shut, we don't have any holiday guests coming so it's easy to ignore.  I know there are many things stacked in that room that just need to go. It's much more pleasant right now to just sit here in the living room, enjoying a nice fire on another cold morning and taking that first sip of coffee.......ah.

I'm also a 'barefoot' kind of gal.  In the summer I rarely have shoes on and in the winter, though I do have nice slippers, I pad around in socks.  Our entire home is covered in tile flooring and though we do have some area rugs, ceramic tile is chilly on the feet! This morning as I got up and didn't want to rummage around in the quiet bedroom looking for my slippers I just grabbed the socks I had on yesterday and came out to start the fire. These are some favorite socks, boot socks with a nice thick middle section (at least they used to be). As I pulled them on I noticed a little too much stretch in the foot -

Oh darn, they are starting to wear out!  It always surprises me how one day something seems just fine and all of a sudden it is wearing out, breaking, or one of the stacks near my 'nest' is about to topple over (like now!).  Things just pile up, start to break,  gather on a table until one day it is either a big mess or like my sock-  worn thin.  Do you notice that your spiritual self can do that same thing? Days will be going along, troubles or temptations come yet we breeze right through them.  The very next day we may face a similar situation yet it brings us to our knees, we are simply worn too thin to take on another thing. We stretch, we try to hang on and all we can do is watch as the fragile threads of our emotions give way and we are left with a hole.  What do you do when the 'holes' appear? How are you handling the stresses of this last week before Christmas? Do you have a list that seems to be too long and the joy of the season is giving way to frustration? What better time than now to continue to ask yourself "why Jesus?"  Don't wait until the threads all completely break inside of you, weave the message of God into your heart now.  Take some time to sit with Him and reflect on WHY you are stretched so thin. The minutes are going to pass and the day will progress as usual, but how you react to what occurs is up to you.  Since I get up and write these ramblings first thing, before I do anything else, I make myself think about God and I ask myself every day "why Jesus?"  I may walk away from this computer and my messy nest and completely come unraveled but I have a better chance of muddling through things when I start my day with God.  I do wear thin, but He mends things back together.  I look at things differently when I look through 'god-eyes'.  

1 Corinthians 10:13 The temptations in your life are no different from what others experience. And God is faithful. He will not allow the temptation to be more than you can stand. When you are tempted, he will show you a way out so that you can endure.

It's a proven fact that when people are stressed, tired, 'worn thin' they are more inclined to give in to negative temptation and behavior.  The statistics of addictions of various sorts support that fact. Many people find it is easier to eat the gallon of ice cream, drink til the bottle is empty, or engage in inappropriate behavior than face the stress or disappointment. Too few will turn to God to fill the hole.  I answered the "why Jesus" question a very long time ago, yet it is a constant struggle to keep listening and allowing God to be my guide. I wear thin and sometimes the hole gets really big, but God is bigger.  This morning as I pulled on these socks and noticed one wearing thin i knew I had to take action - they won't go in the laundry they will be thrown away.  It wasn't that thin sock that made me decide - as I pulled on the other sock I noticed this:

The other matching sock was already worn through, in two places!  How could I not have noticed that yesterday when I wore them?  How did those holes just magically appear overnight?!  Isn't life like that though?  We go along and we notice weak spots or seem stretched to the limit, then things just give way.  I have other socks, or I could just wear these worn out socks and then have irritated feet when I wear my boots.  I choose to get rid of them.  To put on the new, let go of the old and worn.  Kind of like each day with God - I recognize the 'holes' that have formed and I let Him darn them up, or if they are just too big I throw those things away to Him and start new.  Jesus came so we could start new - that is why I said yes to the "why Jesus" question.  How about you?

What's in it for me?

When I was very young my mom decided to try something new.  We always had lots of presents under the Christmas tree, but it really was about quantity.  If we received an outfit, for example, each item would be wrapped in a separate box- more things to open and it drew out the suspense.  We also would draw out the 'opening' of gifts by taking turns and opening one at a time and oohing and ahhing over each gift - even if it was a new pair of socks.  So this one year, I don't even recall exactly how old I was, Mom decided there would be no snooping around the packages, so she numbered each one!  The tag would simply read, in her very pretty handwriting #1, #2 and so on.  She kept a list, carefully hidden, of each package number and who the recipient was. It actually was great fun to look at packages under the tree and try to guess from the size, weight and wrapping who it might be for.  I was always quick to ask "Mom, do you have your list!?"  It was agonizing on Christmas morning to wait for that list to be unfolded, choosing a package and hope it was my name she read.

The tradition of numbering packages actually continued for quite some time.  As my sister and I married and started having our family holidays together, the amount of packages grew along with the number of people sitting around the tree.  Mom quit numbering her packages but Judy and I took up the practice!  The anticipation was great, no one knew who the packages were for.  We did have a few Christmas mornings with missing lists, which actually could be comical as gifts were opened and one of us would have to say "oh, no that's not yours!"  For us, the long process of opening gifts (hours!) was the best part.  It became more about watching each person open their gift - talking about them and thanking each other. for me anyway, it was pure joy in giving.  I miss those days.

Anticipation: Foretaste; previous view or impression of what is to happen afterward.

The anticipation of gift opening and all of the events of the season are what I love best.  I look forward to opening my decoration boxes each year on the day after Thanksgiving, remembering Christmases past as I look at each item and recalling people and events.  I bake items that are only made during the holiday season and savor the flavor of those special recipes. I remember the traditions that we had in our family and want them to continue, I want my daughter and granddaughters to have those same feelings of love and fun when they think back over our times together.  Even the sad moments - recalling that the last time I saw my Dad alive was Christmas 1979.  I came home from my tech school in the Air Force, expecting to hang lights and check each night to see that there were no burned out bulbs on the eaves of the house just like I had done the previous years with my Dad. What I came home to was a very thin, tired version of my Dad - in the midst of treatment for cancer and I remember being shocked at how different he looked.  Even though  we didn't voice it, deep down I wondered that whole season if it would be his last. 

 After Mary had been visited by the Angel Gabriel she paid a visit to her cousin Elizabeth-   Luke 1:39-45 A few days later Mary hurried to the hill country of Judea to the town where Zechariah lived. She entered the house and greeted Elizabeth. At the sound of Mary's greeting, Elizabeth's child leaped within her, and Elizabeth was filled with the Holy Spirit. Elizabeth gave a glad cry and exclaimed to Mary, "God has blessed you above all women, and your child is blessed. Why am I so honored, that the mother of my Lord should visit me? When I heard your greeting, the baby in my womb jumped for joy. You are blessed because you believed that the Lord would do what he said".

Two women, both pregnant and both in unusual circumstances. One after many years of barrenness and the other visited by an angel.  What will be coming next!? Just the anticipation of the birth of a baby is exciting enough, but for these women God was doing miraculous things.  With such odd and almost unbelievable circumstances I'm sure the anticipation  was more than we can imagine.  Isn't it still like that for us today?  We have this Bible, telling us of God's story and recording for us the miracles and ways He moved.  Yet so many regard it still as a story - a fairy tale that is interesting to read, but God isn't going to move like that for them.  Just like a numbered package under the tree, each time I open my Bible it is a gift.  I value the words and how they speak to my heart, as if they were written specifically for me, for just that moment. There will be a treasure inside that speaks directly to my life circumstance. Other times I open it and think "oh, that one's not for me - but I must share it, that is a Word that ______ might receive, what a blessing that would be".  God is alive and moving in lives today.  

It is easy to get bogged down in the depression of our world and all that is going wrong.  I could have just given up on Christmas after 1979, because so many of my traditions were with my parents. I hear comments from many people that say "I don't 'do' Christmas anymore, no kids, why bother" . Or "It is just too hard, and too sad - I just can't put up a tree with my loved one gone". By continuing on with my traditions, even though sometimes the sadness is overwhelming even after all these years,  I keep my mom and dad alive with me every time I look at lights on a house or have that first cookie of the season, with ice cold milk.  I anticipate what's coming.  In fact, I anticipate so much that I battle  depression when it is over.  I hold this season so close to my heart that when it is time to put it all away it's as if I'm losing all of those surprises and traditions forever.  Will this be the last time?  Will I get to do this again? It is the same every year, and though I know it is coming, I can't stop it.   Anticipation can be a good thing, but sometimes it just plain stinks!

One form of anticipation that helps me is the promise of Jesus' return.  As we remember his birth and all that led up to it, the world that was hurting and oppressed, I take comfort knowing that Jesus is walking with me through it and someday he WILL come back and just like during his first coming, God will move in miraculous ways.  Each day I choose another 'numbered package' and wonder what is inside and what nugget or gift God has for me. Some I enjoy and others challenge me and I wonder "why did you give me that?" - always I appreciate the gift and the Giver.

Spend some time today remembering important traditions that you have.  Are you passing them along?  Do you not really have any traditions? How could you start some and what value would there be in passing them along to someone? By telling our story, and telling God's story, we are passing the blessings along....... find someone to 'tell' your story to, then share the gift of Jesus with them.  Maybe you are searching for a gift from God for yourself. Perhaps you are looking for that treasure from God, but it seems it is  always labeled for someone else..... open another "box", your treasure is waiting.  

Children are for young people! zzzzzz

My husband and I lead a pretty quiet and routine life.  All of our days look much the same. Our evenings are spent sharing the events of the day with each other, watching our favorite news show and then going through programs we have recorded on our DVR as we eat our evening meal.  Our mornings also are quite routine, I settle in my 'nest' to study, read and write, and he reads news on his e-reader, eats his breakfast and goes off to his ministry job as a chaplain at the local hospital.  But sometimes those routines get all jumbled up and disrupted unexpectedly!

Yesterday our daughter made a trip to the doctor and learned her lingering cough and malaise were actually bronchitis, sinus infection and pneumonia.  Being a single mom to two young girls she relies on us to help her out and we are blessed to live close by and able to do that.  Having a 3 year old and 6 year old in our normally quiet house really messes with 'old people's' routines!  They do visit us often and are very familiar with our home and spending the night with us, however school night sleep-overs are quite different.  Feeding hungry girls quickly after long days at school and day care, having a little play time, going over homework for the first grader, then baths, combing hair, reading stories and a bit of snuggle time before bed are all fun but tiring.  When they visit on weekends our schedule is more relaxed, and often bed time isn't quite so strict or we do special activities together. Knowing that we all had to get up much earlier and do the 'get ready for school routine' throws our quiet mornings into a bit of chaos.  Breakfast......combing hair again....... getting dressed...... checking backpack......... making beds....... picking up toys........ side trip to feed the chickens and pets........ loading in the car at 7:15 for the 8 mile drive to town , (oops did we get that backpack?) ...... wearing coats because the unpredictable Texas weather dropped into the 40's again....... first stop at daycare to drop off the 3 year old....... then the long wait in a busy elementary school drop off line.  All of this brought memories of long ago when our daughter was young.  But I also was much younger then!  

I'm settled now in my nest and reflecting on all I have done already in 2-1/2 hours this morning.  Those little girls are a huge blessing in our life, but I really like being just Grammy. Doing this routine brought to mind all of those that do this every day.  The over worked and tired parents that don't get enough rest but work multiple jobs just to pay the bills.  The single parents that trudge through each day wondering when they can just catch a little break.  And also the many grandparents and guardians that do what I just did EVERY day, they step in when needed and care for young children because no one else can. I also thought about the many parents that are sick, like our daughter, and have no one to step in and help.  

My morning devotion time was a little different today: on the ride into town our 6 year old granddaughter, Chloe, had brought her Early Reader's Bible in the car with us.  She read through several of the one page stories starting at the beginning, but quickly started looking through the pages to pictures that drew her attention.  She stopped at the page that showed people putting blood over their door frames and read about the Passover.  It was simplified, for a child, yet the main message was "God protected those whose homes were marked with blood" , a complicated and hard story for adults and even more so for children. Bottom line we talked about a God who loves us and looks out for us.  Her response  "just like you care for us, right Grammy?"  Yes, sweet Chloe but in a much larger way.  God loves us much more than we can ever imagine. and that is my "why Jesus" for today.  When I learned, all those years ago, how very much God loves me by sending Jesus to die for me and for all of mankind, it changed my life forever.  God has placed so many different people in my life, and I have grown and learned about Jesus through each relationship.   Where will you be the Light to someone today?  How will you share God's love through your actions? My routine from yesterday evening through this morning was much different than normal.  Two little girls made me physically tired, yet my heart is bursting with love and thanks to God that they are in my life.  

Pause sometime today and look beyond the decorations and busy-ness of this season and notice people around you.  Where can you help a struggling young parent? How can you share a little bit of "why Jesus" with those around you?  It may be as simple as a kind word in a grocery store line, or more involved like caring for young children like we just did - but you can be blessed and be a blessing no matter what.  Watch and do!

Think of someone today whose support has helped strengthen your faith. Write a note of thanks to that person, even if he or she is no longer living or if you have lost touch. If possible, mail or deliver that note as a gift before Christmas. 

My FitBit is giving me a bit of a fit!!

What was the first thing you thought of when you woke up this morning? I would like to say "I yawned and stretched and thought of God and wondered what He had for me today" or "I immediately prayed for my loved ones and that they have the best day ever".  No - my first thought was about my exercise tracker! I have been wearing a FitBit tracker for about a year, and I do enjoy it. One of my favorite features is the ability to participate in challenges with other FitBit wearers.  The key to participating in those challenges, however, is keeping the unit charged!  While my tracker does record my sleep patterns as well, I find that nighttime is the best time to charge my device so that I don't miss out on the races with my friends.  I also like to see how much I toss and turn, looking at the little sleep graphs, yet tracking my exercise during the day is more important. Today I have already been back and forth to the coffee pot, built a fire in the fireplace and settled in my chair to read and write and my FitBit is still not on my wrist - I'm losing ground in the daily challenges!!  LOL

Sometimes when I forget to charge my little friend before bed I then forget to put it on my wrist in the morning, or I realize it is 10 or 11 o'clock and then I figure I'm so far behind that I won't win the challenges anyway, so why put it on.  The main purpose of the device is to track my exercise, for good health.  Yet I like to focus on the competition aspect.  The first 6 months or so that I wore my tracker I didn't do the challenges at all, so I simply competed against myself and the goals I set.  That should be enough!  You are probably wondering what in the world does this have to do with advent, God or "why Jesus"?

My Bible has been my emotional and spiritual 'exercise tracker' for many years.  Sometimes I leave it closed and sitting on a shelf, other times it is open and ready where ever I am (at this very moment I have 2 Bibles - different translations, a study book and two journals open within arms reach!  My 'nest'!) When I keep my equipment ready and close by I do much better in my spiritual fitness, same as my physical exercise.  I have become so attached to that little band that I wear on my wrist, that unless I'm wearing it I sometimes don't even bother going for my walk.  I want to have that prompt and step count to help me achieve my goals.  Same with my Bible and journals, I want to pour out my heart on the pages and then search the Scriptures for a word from God.  It is challenging, it prompts me to learn more and it helps me realize that I am not alone in my journey.  Just like when I forget to charge my FitBit, when I don't bother to open my Bible and spend time 'recharging' I often find that I go through my day with no purpose.  I don't have that reminder of how God is so very present in my life and He wants me to rely on Him.  When I focus my mind and actions on serving instead of self-serving my day goes much better.

It's easy in these last 10 days before Christmas to put aside our 'trackers'.  To fill our days with last minute preparations that really have nothing to do with the goal of celebrating "why Jesus".  My own list has things like bake cookies with the granddaughters, wrap some gifts and plan meals.  This morning, after my first thought of "where is my FitBit!?" my next thought was "God, what is my goal and most important thing to do today?"  It is the same as every day...... sometimes I just forget to recharge.

Mark 12:30-31  And you must love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, and all your strength. The second is equally important, "Love your neighbor as yourself". No other commandment is greater than these.

"But God......"

Luke 1:5-7 In the time of Herod king of Judea there was a priest named Zechariah, who belonged to the priestly division of Abijah; his wife Elizabeth was also a descendant of Aaron. Both of them were upright in the sight of God, observing all the Lord's commandments and regulations blamelessly. BUT they had no children, because Elizabeth was barren; and they were both well along in years.

I put the word "but" in all caps for a reason, it isn't written that way in my Bible.  I had a good friend tell me once that whenever you add the word but to a sentence it is as if everything said before the "but" is gone or has no value.  I think about that often when I use that word. Look at those few verses again, if the word but was not there it would just be a continuance of facts. What we focus on is not what fine upstanding people Z & E were, the important thing in the eyes of the world was the fact that she had no children.

Look at these sentences:  Tamar is mentioned in the line of Jesus BUT she pretended to be a prostitute in order to get what she wanted.   Rahab was a woman of great courage, vision and hope and did what was necessary to improve her future BUT she was a prostitute. Naomi and Ruth were in a hard situation and traveling as refugees BUT because of the provision of Boaz they secured a future. I have repeatedly made mistakes and chosen paths that probably didn't please God BUT because Jesus is who he is I keep going another day. The "but" can cancel out the bad stuff too!

One little word that can make a world of difference. The beauty of God is He can see beyond that but.  It is not so easy for us.  One thing I work on avoiding, and still fail miserably at, is letting that word creep negatively into my vocabulary.  I try really hard to compliment others then this happens "you did so well, I'm proud of you but........ "I really like how that turned out but......."      "Thank you for the compliment but I still.................".  The last example is one I used to tell people often when leading Weight Watchers meetings for over 5 years.  When members would start to lose weight and they would receive a compliment , the response was usually "thank you, but I have so far to go".  That but just lessens the value of all that had been accomplished.     Why do we respond to a compliment with a BUT!?  

I often live in the "but".  I dwell in not what is, or what blessings I have -but  dwell in all that is wrong.  I challenge you today to watch for the but when speaking with others and in how you respond to things.  I have kind of pushed this down the last few years, I used to think of it often after my friend made that statement to me.  Try it today!  Every time you are about to say BUT, just leave it out or think of another word to put in its place, then see how the feel changes.  Then go a step further, when you are talking to others listen for the 'but' and consciously listen for what was said before the but.  

The world was a in a bad way (sound familiar?) BUT God sent Jesus.  Are you getting closer to your answer for "why Jesus?"

For an added encouragement spend some time today in this passage: Ephesians 2:1-9  

I've Been Knocked Down....But I Get Up Again........

Sometimes life just doesn't go along as planned!  Imagine that you are Joseph and you are betrothed to Mary.  In a Jewish betrothal period there are no sexual relations, but it was a more binding relationship than a modern engagement and it could only be broken by divorce. When Joseph learned that Mary was 'with child through the Holy Spirit' he intended to do just that, divorce her quietly. He would sign the papers and not have her judged publicly and possibly even stoned, because he was a righteous man. God had another plan!  

Matthew 1:20-25 But after he had considered this, an angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream and said, "Joseph son of David, do not be afraid to take Mary home as your wife, because what is conceived in her is from the Holy Spirit. She will give birth to a son, and you are to give him the name Jesus, because he will save his people from their sins". All this took place to fulfill what the Lord had said through the prophet: "The virgin will be with child and will give birth to a son, and they will call him Immanuel - which means, "God with us".  When Joseph woke up, he did what the angel of the Lord had commanded him and took Mary home as his wife. But he had no union with her until she gave birth to a son. And he gave him the name Jesus.

I want to have faith like Joseph.  Life is really hard and sometimes -we think we have it all figured out and bam - something smacks you front on and just takes the wind out of you! Can you even imagine what Joseph's peers thought of him?  Can't you just hear the snickering and finger pointing as he walked about the village, "can you believe he is believing this wild story she is telling him!?"  "There is no way I would let a woman like that be in my life".  I really don't think we can comprehend what life must have been like for the two of them.  But I do know what it is like to be judged on appearance.  I have done it, in fact I battle against making judgments based on appearance and behaviors, even today.  I also have been on the receiving end as well.  Even my current choice of job - in direct sales, gets judgment and criticism.  "Oh, she's in one of those pyramids" (no, I'm not),  "I wonder why she doesn't get a real job" - (it is a real job, I just happen to be self employed and my paycheck depends on my own efforts).  When people make decisions about their lives it is hard not to use our set of circumstances as a filter in making assumptions about them.  As people looked at Joseph I would guess that many of them just couldn't quite understand a faith so strong and a belief in that word from God through an angel, that their reaction was then criticism and doubt.  How often do you do that?  You just don't understand the WHY of a decision, so you assume it is a bad one.  I have been guilty of that many times in my life.

One of the things I learned, and have practiced as a life coach and team leader in my business, is to understand what the 'why' is that drives people.  I work with women ranging in age from early 20's to mid 60's- 37 of them!  Some work to provide for their families, others work as a hobby to have 'play' money.  There is a different 'why' for each of us, but those differences are what drive us.  Though I haven't had a vivid and distinct dream as Joseph did, I do have a strong faith and I turn to God when I make decisions.  I pray hard, I pause, listen and I wait.  Do I always make the right decision?  No,  but I also don't give up. There is always something to be learned in every situation.  

Today as you go about your day, consider Joseph and his obedience.  His willingness to listen to a dream and take the hard road.  To look long into the future and be ready to walk the hard road to get there. It may seem impossible, it may mean facing ridicule from peers and even family members, but stay true to the urging inside of you. This also goes along with our advent question of "why Jesus?".  For me, it is because I believe in the promise of the Savior.  I know what that faith has done for me in my life, so I hold on to the fact and the promise in the future to come.   What is your why?

On Pointe!

When I put our manger scene out at the beginning of advent I left baby Jesus hidden so that I can talk about his coming with the little girls  (Chloe age 6 and Ryleigh age 3) all through the season. We have the scene down on a table where our granddaughters can look at it, play with the figures and see it every time they visit.  The very first time they visited after it was out, our astute almost 7 year old noticed right away that the baby wasn't in the scene. She has asked each time she visits "Is it time for Jesus yet? Where is he?" 

Last night the little girls spent a few hours with us, and as usual the living room/kitchen area was set up with various vignettes for their Barbie and small dolls collection, they were playing very nicely together while Gr-pa and I relaxed in our chairs.  When it was time to clean up, the familiar whirlwind of activity took place - putting everything back in order before their mom arrived to pick them up.  The cards and blocks were all back in their containers after serving as sofas, and other furniture.  The dishtowels hung back on the rack instead of being rugs and blankets, and all of the Barbies and other dolls placed back in their storage tub. Then I noticed this:

A ballerina in the manger!  She's "having a talk with Mary" as they all wait for Jesus to arrive! Well, why not? Chloe visits that manger scene each time she is in our house and she is not so patiently waiting to see that baby, she just didn't want it to be empty anymore and it was the perfect place to have her ballerina take a rest.

While this scene probably isn't much like the actual place where Jesus was born, it did take me back to our story of Ruth that we have been visiting this week. Just like Chloe's ballerina, Ruth was a 'foreigner' in the land of Boaz.  She visited that strange place - the harvesting/threshing floor and things were set in place for her life (and that of her mother in law Naomi) to change for the good.  Take some time today to read the last chapter of Ruth, 4:1-18 to learn the rest of the story. Naomi, who names herself bitter, and Ruth seemed to be in an impossible life situation, yet things turned completely around for them. Despair turned to joy - did you see God in that situation?  At the end of the chapter we see the link from Tamar and Judah's sons in Genesis, to Ruth and Boaz's son.  That line is then ultimately traced down to Jesus, and here we are at  the manger.  If you were Naomi how do you imagine you would sit with the little boy Obed and explain how his dad and mom came to be married?  How would you weave God into the story?

A little plastic ballerina doesn't seem to fit in the manger scene, but I think I may just leave her there for the season! Aren't we all foreigners in some way, looking for answers from God? Take some time today to look back at your past relationships, ones that molded you and changed the direction of your life. How has God intervened in your life in unexpected ways and through 'out of the ordinary' people?  Let yourself be the ballerina in the scene today, sit down for a chat with Mary and Joseph - ponder why they so obediently followed God, and then ask how you can do the same. Keep asking "why Jesus?"

It's all about family

The story of Ruth is somewhat difficult for us to understand.  The laws of the land had strict guidelines about family provision, and while some of the treatment of women and how things were done were (and sometimes still are) very foreign to us, it was commonplace during that time and that land.  Naomi was concerned for her daughter in law and her future.  While at first glance the story may see that Naomi is scheming and conniving in securing a future for Ruth, she really was just going back to all that she had known and been taught according to how families provide for one another. I think our society needs a little more of that these days.

Much of this won't make sense unless you read the continuing story of Ruth.  Today in Chapter 2:21-3:18 Naomi instructs Ruth to go the next step, to "go to the threshing floor (where they had finished working after the harvest) and uncover Boaz's feet and lie down". One of my study Bibles states it this way: Although Naomi's instructions may appear forward, the moral integrity of Naomi and Ruth is never in doubt.  Naomi's instruction to Ruth is clearly for the purpose of appealing to Boaz's kinsman obligation.  (Boaz was a relative of Naomi's husband).  Ruth's actions were a request for marriage. Ruth was a stranger to Israelite customs, so she had to be told in detail how to make her appeal to her kinsman for protection and marriage.

Sometimes we just need to listen to our mama!  (Or in this case, mother in law.) I really don't like people telling me what to do, but boy howdy do I like to tell others what to do!!  I know this about myself, and it takes conscious effort to reign it in sometimes.  I grew up with wise and kind parents, they taught with gentle instruction, but I knew where the 'line' was and not to cross it.  I also watched them, I listened to them and my good qualities were passed along from my parents as I'm sure theirs were from their parents.  I realize, now that I am older, that the values I hold most dear are those that were passed along from my parents. When I read the accounts in the Bible they seem so foreign, written in a land and time that I can't imagine being part of.  The customs are so very different than ours.  Then I started studying the Bible in depth, and went on to take as many courses as possible, ultimately working as a Christian Educator. The more I studied, the more I wanted to know!  When you start reading the Bible as a whole, as God's redeeming story that is recorded for us, then it all starts to fall in place. Just like the family tree of Jesus being recorded in Matthew, these accounts of real people point us to God.  He is giving us that background so we can understand a little better the answers to our advent question of "why Jesus". One thing that really gets under my skin is how often people will pull one verse out and make their point, usually in an argument, about "this is what the Bible says". Doctrines, and whole belief systems have been formed by this practice. I challenge you to not give in to the throwing around of verses to make your point, but to really learn the whole story, to understand the process of kinsman redeemer and see why this is important to us.  To feel that connection to God and His provision for us. 

Boaz takes notice of Ruth because of her kindness to her mother-in-law and her hard work. What traits do you think people would mention in describing your close relationships? Take a moment today and sit in God's presence and give thanks for the lessons you have learned from the people who surrounded you in your early life.  May your prayer today be "thank you for those who formed me".  And one more thing: perhaps you are one that didn't have a good influence or the instruction in your family was oppressive and abusive - my prayer is that you read the story of Ruth even more deeply, to discover that there really is a loving Redeemer for you, and should you want to talk about "why Jesus" - that is exactly why I write.  Message me!! God loves you too...............

Go and do likewise........

Sometimes things just don't go as planned!  As I sat this morning and wrote "the best blog post ever" I hit one small key on this computer and it was all gone!  Poof - no recovering, nothing it was just gone!  

I kind of had a little meltdown, and my sister's reply "I guess God wants you to write something else!"  

This week we started reading about Ruth and Naomi, two refugees that were wandering and wondering how they would survive after the loss of the men in their lives.  In chapter 2 of Ruth we meet Boaz, a distant family member who allowed Ruth to glean from his fields.  If you aren't familiar with gleaning here is a snippet:

Old Testament

According to the Holiness Code and the Deuteronomic Code of the Torah, farmers should leave the corners of their fields unharvested, and they should not attempt to pick up that which was dropped or harvest any left-overs that had been forgotten when they had harvested the majority of a field.^[2][3][4] On one of the two occasions that this is mentioned by the Holiness Code, it adds that, in vineyards, some grapes should be left ungathered,^[5] an argument made also by the Deuteronomic Code.^[6]

New Testament

Jesus and his disciples practiced a form of gleaning as they walked through grain fields breaking off heads of wheat to eat.^[9]

In this season of "giving" some people go all out and are very generous to foundations, causes and people - they give, check that box off of their holiday list and feel good about doing so.  Giving like this is a great thing, and many people benefit.  But what about December 26?  What about the elderly neighbor that eats cereal every night and her family lives so far away, or perhaps she has no family at all?  How do we cultivate that 'giving' mindset to go with us long after that holiday season?  I hope you will take a moment today and read at least chapter two of Ruth.  Ultimately Ruth would become Boaz' wife, but in the beginning he was providing for two women that had no where else to go, and no means to provide.  Look around you today as you go about your work schedule or your fun holiday events - find a way to give back that is not all about the season but more about the nudging in your heart to have a giving spirit.  The gift of your time can be the most valuable of all, to sit and listen to someone in need. Sometimes when we are in need ourselves if we take the time to look outward and see how we can 'give' to someone else it helps us realize that maybe we are more blessed than we realize.  

After Ruth gleaned in the fields Naomi said these words to her  (Ruth 2:20)  Naomi said to her daughter in law "May he be blessed of the Lord who has not withdrawn his kindness to the living or the dead".

Go today and be a blessing to someone..... and be blessed.